Morning ;)

Hey, so on a liquid fast until 7:30pm today (24hour) and so far had a hot chocolate, which was roughly 300 calories, (but the fucking cafe doesn't have the nutritional information on the website. Grr! Isn't that fucking illegal or something?

Was reading "dying to be thin" - that blog i was talking about, last night, and she really does face many of the same situations that I do.
Like, my best friend "D" and I have been friends for aages, and she knows almost everything about me. She doesn't know about my ED persay, but she knows that I'm not comfortable with my body, and that that could lead to something more. And, i love to hang out with her, and like, the other week we were at the movies. And she refuses to eat unless I eat. She really wanted some subway, and asked if I was going to have one too. I said no thanks, and so she said she wasn't going to have one anymore. GRR. And of course that make me feel guilty, so I ended up with a FUCKING FOOT LONG vegetable sub.
This happens all the time, even If i'm at her house around her parents and everyone, if i refuse to eat, so does she. I want to be like "fine, just don't eat, see if i care" kind of thing, but I can't, because always so terrifeid of someone finding out about my ED.
Hmm,.

Kwell anyway, I'm off. Mum;s going to make me go food shopping today, and my plan is to stock up on yuck muslei bars (that I won't eat, but my dad will) and lots of low calorie juices and snacks. I think she's going to make me go to the supermarket where the guy I used to have a massive thing for works, at the checkout, no less. GRR. If HE knows what I'm eating, and sees all the food my family eats, he's going to thinki I'm a fat fucking whale. GRGRGRGR