day 20 :)

wohoo, made it to the end of the 20day fast.
Acomplished so much on this fast. Got so much confidence, lost 10kgs in 20days. Haven't eaten in 3 days, not eating until at least 7:30 tonight. I could go on so much longer, for at least a week I reckon, but the thing is, I don't want to risk it, Mums already onto the fact that I'm not eating.
But I had half a woodstock this morning as a reward, (was going to have the whole thing, but after 2days of nothing, it made my stomach feel funny. That and, it was only 8:30am, hahahah) and since then, I've only had water, and cleaned the house, annd my room. Its amazing the things you get done when you don't spend all your time preparing food :D i haven't gone three days without food since returning to ana, and i love it.
I don't even feel hungry, thats how i know i could keep doing this.
And, since ive cleaned my sisters room, and emptied everything, then my dad has to keep his his side of the bargian, and go look into getting a cross trainer next weekend, which means marathon workouts virtually every day.

And apart from getting so dizzy and nearly blacking out every time I stand up, things are going really good. i still feel really bad for ditching my friends for drinks last night, and lieing to everyone about what ive been doing this weekend, and what ive eaten. i hate lieing. And i know for a fact that when mum gets home she'll ask what ive eaten, and i have to lie.
Well, i think i am going to go cook some food, and throw it out, then leave the dishes, so that it makes it look like ive eaten. And im not going to eat it, theres no fucking way. and if i do, even just a taste? then i can just fuckoff and die of obesity. I need to be able to control myself, but i know i can.

Talk lateeeer, xoxoox