Why do you tell me you care if your not going to stay?

Grr. Still mad at the whole "I" situation. Hes just ignoring me now, and blatently flirting with everyone else when I'm around. Not that I care anymore. Truly. The only 2 that i need in my life is the Lord and ana.

Omg, my friend "c" is the biggest wanna be anorexic I have ever met in my life.
Shes probably caught on to the fact that I don't eat at school, but when i see her out of school, I always come up with excuses why.
And now shes going on a 'diet,' and she was telling me all these exclusive things shes doing to make herself skinny, like no bread, only those crusket crackers. Then, I see her eating 5 cookies and a packet of chips every day this week. She just wanted everyone to think she was on a diet, so they could tell her how skinny she already is. Its so pathetic, like, she makes a big deal about trying to give her food away to somebody, and she'll make a huge scene around everybody. Its sooo annoying, truly.

Made a deal with my dad last night, if i clean out my sisters room (she left yesterday, for uni) then not this saturday, but next, he will go down and look at hire a crosstrainer. Im so keen, marathon workouts afterschool everyday, and on saturdays before im allowed to go out.
And, her rooms a bombsite, so that burns calories too.

Had a bad day today though, which is a shame, cause its almost the end of my 20day fast. I was so depressed, (no shock) and barley talked to anyone all day.
But isn't it funny, that theres always those few people who can cheer you up, when noone else can? It was the new people I sit with in maths class, they just cheered me up so much, so for a period, i was happy. But then, came home, and ate alot. 2pieces of toast, one with cheese and chicken, the other with a bit of cheese, and 2 bowls of vanilla icecream, and some frozen grapes. and a cookie i think, unless i spat that out before the binch got too bad :/
Don't think im going to reach under 60kgs by sunday :/ fml
TO DO:
Clean out sisters room, really well.
Freeze some more grapes.
Throw out all ice creams and junk foods in the house.
Get more of my a'dpills
Get under 60kgs.
By a pair of electronic scales.
Start getting happy.

God and ana, my loves <3